My Immortal
by Dark-flames
Summary: Angel has fallen after a big fight against evil, Buffy at his side. Lonely and tiered the slayer makes a decision, of which some will suffer and some will find peace… Songfic to My Immortal


My Immortal  
  
Summary: Angel has fallen after a big fight against evil, Buffy at his side. Lonely and tiered the slayer makes a decision, of which some will suffer and some will find peace...  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own any of it, not Buffy the Vampire slayer, and not Evanescence songs. If I did I probably wouldn't be sitting here with my butt drowned in studying.  
  
Hope you enjoy though, oh and PLEASE REVIEW!  
  
I'm so tired of being here  
  
Don't. The tears just keep on falling.  
  
Suppressed by all my childish fears  
  
She presses the worn out piece of wood against her hand as she cries in silence.  
  
And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave  
  
' Why, Why did you have to do this to me? ' After all they had come through he wasn't leaving her alone, he couldn't be.  
  
Because your presence still lingers here.  
  
The tombstones are cold and the night is sweeping her away, off her feet and lulling her into sleep, as she breaths in the last of his scent that still lingers in her tearstained shirt.  
  
And it won't leave me alone.  
  
'Angel! ' She cries out his name into the darkness, no one answers her. From some distance away a few figures watch her as she clenches her fists.  
  
These wounds wont seem to heal This pain is just too real There's just too much that time cannot erase  
  
'No... ' She opens her eyes as she sobs freely. 'It didn't have to end like this. It's not fair. ' But no one ever asked her if it was fair, no one ever asked her anything. They just gave her, the filth and dirt that come with the job she had never asked for. The slayer. ' Pathetic. ' She didn't think it would matter if they lost her, there would always be a new slayer. Sure the figures that hid beneath the old gate quite a distance from her, yes she knew they where there, would grief her for a while. She would miss them, but not as much as she missed life. She hadn't felt alive for such a long time. She just felt that heavy weight forcing her heart down, slowly creeping up on her, making her a machine, built to kill. To slay. The Slayer!  
  
When you'd cry I'd wipe away all of your tears  
  
He had saved her, had held her and told her it was nothing to worry about, that as long as he had a breath left she wouldn't have to worry.  
  
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears  
  
But he was gone now. When she'd wake up in the night, sweating in terror for the next in line to slay, she wouldn't have his hand to reach for. Even though he would never be in reach, he would always be there, always out there. Even when he turned evil. Oh god, even then!  
  
And I've held your hand through all of these years  
  
Angel. He really was an Angel. Her angel, her angel of love. And death.  
  
But you still have all of me  
  
No matter how hard she would press that stick into her hand the pain wouldn't go away, and even if it did, it wouldn't change who she was, she was the Slayer, built and alive only for one soul purpose, to slay and extinguish evil.  
  
You used to captivate me  
  
She smiled at their first encounter  
  
By your resonating light  
  
He had given her a necklace. She fingered around the silver cross that protected her neck, hanging around her throat.  
  
But now I'm bound by the life you left behind  
  
The fight. She saw the light and her eyes closed as if trained to do so. Her body shook as her inner eye brought her back in time.  
  
Flashback 'Angel!' 'Buffy go, GO!' He had almost sounded angry, but she knew why. He had been begging her to leave. End flashback  
  
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams  
  
He had died, or at least in this world, he had been sent on. But not to hell, no he had deserved so much more than that. He had saved the world that night, and her. He had said he loved her with his last breath, and then he had really moved on, his soul now immortal to anything. She looked down at the stick in her hand. It had blood dripping from it. Her blood. She had been pressing it into her hand so hard she was bleeding, and she couldn't feel it, not over this pain. She really loved him. She had killed the remaining vampires just in rage, but together they had killed the master of all vampires. She was so tiered now, her tears still falling down she shut her eyes, just for a little while, she told herself. It felt like a year, no not even that, it felt like a hundred years, like all those long years she was praying to live with him.  
  
You're voice it chased away all the sanity in me  
  
So simple.  
  
She felt a hand on her shoulder. 'Buffy' It was him, he was calling her. She opened her eyes and drew in his scent, but the night air was empty, she looked up. No just her imagination. But he was there. She was not with him, but he was there, waiting for her, lingering. She had done her duty, now the slayer would rest. The world was saved once more, she needed her rest. 'I'm sorry.' She sent all her love to her friends under that gate. Then she stood up, and turned so her body faced them.  
  
These wounds wont seem to heal  
  
She raised the stick above her heart with both her hands.  
  
This pain is just too real  
  
She saw them. Saw that twitch in Sanders face as it dawned on them all what she was about to do. She saw them run, towards her. But they where still far, to far...  
  
There's just too much that time cannot erase  
  
She looked right forward. 'I'm just to tiered, I've done my duty. I'm so sorry' 'Buffy please just listen to us. ' 'Stay. ' They had reached her but kept at a distance, she had strength still in her body, and it wasn't worth challenging. Not now, not again.  
  
When you cried I'd wipe away all of you're tears  
  
She was still crying.  
  
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of you're fears  
  
'BUFFY!' 'Stay away from me. If you have any feelings in you're body and by god I know you all do, stay away. I have done my job, now it's time for me to live.' 'No! Please.' They stayed. And she plunged it against her heart. Screamed! She screamed like she had not done for so many years, and as her body stumbled backwards his scent filled her. 'Are you sure. '  
  
And I've held you're hand through all of these years  
  
'Angel? ' 'You don't have to go yet. ' 'No. ' ' So you're not sure. ' 'More than ever! '  
  
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone  
  
It was so warm, a feeling that she loved, she had always wanted it to be warm, she lived in California, in Sunnydale. She had to love warmth, but some of her friends sometimes longed for snow. She didn't! 'You... You came for me'  
  
And though you're still with me  
  
'I never left. I never would, you know that.' 'Did you mean it when you said you loved me?' 'For eternity, that's how long I'll be here, that's how long I'll love you. Til this world and the next and the one after that. I love you and never have anyone else, I think I've told you that before. But they'll miss you. '  
  
I've been alone all along  
  
'It's my time to go now. ' He pulled, and she came. She heard the cries she left behind, but she knew they would silence after time.  
  
Every day of every year she walked by them and helped them, with Angel by her side. She knew they sensed her. Sometimes they would even talk to her. And she waited with him. One day they would all be together again. Together in the paradise they deserved. They deserved love... She said she would go to hell and back to get it for them. She had!  
  
The end  
  
Authors note: I just got in the mood to write it, hope you liked... Review please, and be honest, I don't won't lies, but I don't fancy hate mail either.. You know what I mean... By the way, Spike is to die for... DarkFlames 


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